STEVE & JACKSON

England penalty-taker, Mum appears and says, perhaps with her eyes: “You’ve made it worse.”

Once this has happened a dozen or so times, you begin to resent the crying. Not because it is baby’s fault but you associate it with a misplaced feeling of inadequacy. Resentment sets in.

Mum knows the difference between a tired cry and a hungry cry. You don’t. Mum, if she’s breastfeeding, has the ability to feed him. on a university campus on a weekend will be familiar with the sight of a dad looking bemused as he stares at his child with an “I’m paying for this” look on his face. For previous generations of fathers, being a provider like this has been their primary concern. David Innes, 67, dad to Richard, remembers his experience as a first-time dad somewhat differently to today’s new fathers. “When your sister, my first child, was born, the idea of paternity leave was never mentioned,” he recalls. “I had to do my day’s work and then come home to look after your mum. “The work-life balance was different. There was no note made of the role of a father.” Now, we live in a world where there is a new set of expectations and pressures on a new father – and it can be a hard burden to shoulder.

Men don’t really talk about this but we have found since launching our podcast that they want to. If dads are to play a big part in early years childcare, we should listen to them, even if it might be hard above the cry of the baby.