HE CAN’T DO IT 5 TIMES A NIGHT

Dear Coleen

I’m a 20-year-old woman and also a new bride. My problem is, I desire sex a lot and want my husband to make love to me a minimum of five times a night, but he is not co-operative, so often it’s only a couple of times a night. This isn’t enough for me. What should I do? Am I expecting too much of him? I’d love your input.

Coleen says

I actually have a friend who’s just like you. She wants sex morning, noon and night, while her hubby is working two jobs and is totally exhausted.

OK, it’s great that you desire your husband so much and clearly have a great sex drive, but you also need to be realistic. And if you’re looking for it five times a night, then that’s not realistic, that’s like an addiction.

I get a lot of letters from men saying their wives have lost interest in sex and always find an excuse not to do it. I usually advise them to stop treating their partner like a sex object and to stop coming across like sex is all they’re interested in. And I think that’s what you have to do, because right now he’s thinking he’s just there to satisfy you – and that’s not sexy, it’s not a turn-on, and sex has become a chore.

You know that old saying, you can have too much of a good thing? Well your situation is a case in point. If you weren’t having sex at all, then I’d be questioning your compatibility and whether your husband wanted to be in the relationship, but I think you’re being unfair.

All successful marriages have compromise at their core, so I think you and your husband need to try to meet halfway when it comes to your sex life.

Good luck.