MORTIFIED BY SON’S BEHAVIOUR

Dear Coleen

I’m in an awkward situation with my neighbours after my son treated their daughter badly.

They were dating, but he was seeing other girls behind her back and then she found out and he left her after a party to get home alone. She was heartbroken and, rightfully, her parents are mad.

It’s really affected how I feel

– it reflects on us as parents and I don’t want to leave the house in case I bump into this girl’s parents.

I’ve obviously told my son what I think of the way he behaved and asked him to apologise, but so far he hasn’t, saying he’ll do it in his own time. How can I save face?

Coleen says

It’s going to be hard to avoid the neighbours. So if I were you, I’d go to see them, and just say: “Obviously, I’m not proud of my son’s behaviour and I’m sorry he hurt your daughter. I hope it doesn’t cause a rift between us.”

Your kids are going to mess up and you can’t get too involved in their relationships.

While the girl’s parents will be angry with your son, I don’t think they’ll necessarily be angry with you. I think they’d only be annoyed with you if you were defending him.

I’m sure they’d appreciate you saying something and I’m sure they’ll understand that you can’t make your son apologise.

Plus, it’s not really an apology if you’ve had to force him into it.