The card giveth…

The Church of England is allowing worshippers to give their donations via contactless payment machines, and I think Jesus would approve. Matthew 19:21 quotes him as saying: “If you want to be perfect, give to the poor and you will have treasure in heaven.”

So they’re merely modernising Matthew by adding the words: “Now just pop your card over this machine, with the bit that looks like a wi-fi signal, that’s it, there you go.”

I’m sure my own Catholic church will follow suit soon.

Although there must be hundreds of altar boys wishing the priests had gone contactless decades ago.