HIS EX WANTS MY BOYFRIEND TO STAY OVER

Dear Coleen

I’m 25 and my boyfriend is 30 and has a son from his last relationship. We’ve been together for a year and he split up with his ex a couple of years ago.

The problem is, she constantly texts and calls him, asking if he wants to meet her for a drink or stay the night and it’s really getting to me.

He knows it drives me mad, so I’m sure I’m only getting half the story.

I understand they have a son together and will always be in each other’s lives because of that, but I just wish she would realise he’s moved on with me.

How do I tell my boyfriend that I don’t want him talking to her unless it’s about childcare arrangements without causing a massive row?

Coleen says

It might cause an argument, but you should still tell your boyfriend how you feel.

It’s good you see the importance of his relationship with his son, but that’s all it should be about – not his relationship with his ex.

There have to be some boundaries. Your boyfriend shouldn’t be replying to any messages that don’t concern his son. And the next time she texts asking him to spend the night or have a drink, he needs to make it clear that isn’t going to happen and that he won’t respond to those texts in the future.

If he can’t see your point of view, then I’d think very carefully about what kind of future you’ll have with him because his ex is always going to be in the picture.