MEAN FRIEND AWAYS JUDGES MY PARENTING

Dear Coleen

I’m a 40-year-old woman and have this friend I met through my daughter’s school, who’s become a really negative influence in my life.

I didn’t realise it at first until I started to become stressed and apprehensive every time she called or I was due to meet up with her.

She loves giving advice, whether it’s asked for or not, on everything from my marriage to how I bring up my kids. She’s very critical and patronising. It’s like she’s the authority on everything. In truth, she’s a bully and seems to have this really angry side to her.

I thought she was great at first because she was very open about overcoming various problems and she behaves like she has the moral high ground on everything.

What should I do about it? She’s making me miserable.

Coleen says

If she’s bringing negativity into your life, then don’t have her in your life – it’s as simple as that.

Don’t beat yourself up about becoming friends with her. It’s often hard to recognise toxic people until they’ve weaved their way into the fabric of your life. Sometimes you have to burn a few bridges for the sake of your own happiness, so burn the bridge that links you to this woman!

You don’t need to have a big showdown, just take a big step back and stop engaging with her.

You can be polite when you see her at the school gates or if she messages you, but don’t take things any further. Don’t develop this relationship.

There’s probably never been a better time to take this step because Covid means we’re being far less sociable than we were.