I’M WORRIED I’LL NEVER HAVE A RELATIONSHIP

Dear Coleen

I’m a single woman in my 30s and I’m starting to panic that I can’t have a lasting relationship.

In my 20s, I was with someone for five years, who I really loved, but he cheated and broke my heart. Since then I’ve never met anyone else who compares.

It’s hard to see all my friends dating, getting married and having babies, while I’m not moving forward. I have been on lots of dates, but I never take them any further. Am I too picky or unrealistic? I keep waiting for someone to sweep me off my feet and give me butterflies, but it never happens!

Coleen says

Well, first of all, don’t panic. I don’t believe there’s just one person out there for us and if you were meant to end up with your ex, you’d still be together. He wasn’t the one for you – he let you down, so you have to take off your rose-tinted specs.

Maybe none of these dates you’ve had were right either; maybe you just didn’t fancy them. But I also think you have to give people a chance, keep an open mind and stop comparing every guy to your ex.

And when you do go on a date, I think it’ll help to try to relax and just enjoy it without thinking too far ahead into the future.

So what if your mates are all dating or married? We have to do things at our own pace and not feel railroaded into making wrong decisions because it’s what our friends are doing. You might meet the love of your life while your mates are struggling in their relationships or getting divorced!

I’m sure your ex has moved on so you should feel excited about all the great things ahead of you.