Virus Diary Week 37

In a bid to drum up a little bit of custom in near-impossible trading conditions a Belfast record shop held a drawing competition this week. The idea was to get kids to recreate a favourite album cover and the best 12 will feature in Starr Records’ 2021 calendar. There are also prizes for the top three but really it’s about kudos and having something immortalised in print. We got our youngsters involved

– well, the three-year-old flat refused – but it left us with a difficult puzzle to solve, namely which album would best show off our hip dad credentials. It had to be well known, or at least recognisable, but not of the mainstream. It had to be something a six-year-old could make a good fist of rendering in colouring pencils or felt tip and, well, show off our hip dad credentials. Let’s just cut to the chase – this competition is not about kids finding a short diversion for the trudgery of life in semi-lockdown, barred from visiting pals’ houses and smearing their way through the local playparks. No, this was an opportunity for parents to make ke themselves look good in the eyes of the cool muso types who run record shops. “Big Beat From Badsville by The Cramps? Highly inappropriate for children... but at least it’s not Coldplay,” we heard them say in our heads. “Cafe Bleu, by The Style

Council? That child is lucky to have parents who realise how much better Paul Weller became post-the Jam.” The shop workers throw each other dangerous glances. Anyway, after a week of suggestions and carelessly leaving Velvet Underground records in his toy box, the boy chose Sergeant Pepper’s on his own and to be fair he made a decent stab at it. Revolver would have been better but there you go...