Daily Mirror (Northern Ireland)
Closet Christmas
I12 ★★★
t’s a time for giving, a time for getting, a time for forgiving and a time for forgetting. But if you can’t live up to Sir Cliff Richard’s high standards, perhaps it’s time for a different kind of festive cheer.
So what if you’re spending Christmas in self-isolation? At least you’re not Kristen Stewart’s Abby.
In this seasonal romcom, it’s a case of mistletoe and whine as Stewart’s kind, trusting PHD student is forced to spend the most wonderful time of the year with the horrible family of her lying girlfriend
Harper, played by Mackenzie Davis. While driving from New York to Grove City, journalist Harper confesses to Abby that she lied about coming out and asks her to climb back into the closet and stay there for the duration of their five-day visit.
Abby reluctantly agrees to pose as Harper’s straight “orphan” flatmate, a decision she grows to regret as the festive break turns into a holiday season from hell.
Neglecting her partner, Harper spends the days bickering with her catty sister Sloane (Alison Brie) and sucking up to her charmless parents – selfish politician Ted (Victor Garber) and his pushy wife Tipper (Mary Steenburgen). While Harper makes a show of partying with her ex-boyfriend, Abby finds an ally in Harper’s secret exgirlfriend Riley (Aubrey Plaza) who has seen all this before.
This time, Plaza is playing it straight.
The comedic relief comes from Mary Holland as Harper’s kooky younger sister, and Daniel Levy as Abby’s camp best friend.
Stewart is excellent, and Levy makes the most of the film’s only funny lines.
But for long stretches of the movie’s 102 minutes, this unusually fraught romantic comedy fails to deliver the audience either romance or jokes.
Abby finds an ally in Harper’s ex girlfriend who’s seen it all before