HE’S UNHAPPY AFTER MOVING BUT I ADORE IT

Dear Coleen

My partner and I moved to another part of the country about 18 months ago to make a fresh start with our two young children. We’d had a rough couple of years – a big fallout with my parents, our eldest daughter was unhappy in school, we weren’t getting on great and we decided there was nothing stopping us from making a change.

Despite the lockdowns this year, I’m loving where we’ve moved to and have made some friends through my kids’ school. Things with my husband are better, too.

However, the problem is he’s unhappy. He doesn’t like his job and he misses his family and friends. He’s never lived anywhere other than the town we grew up in and feels like a fish out of water.

He even said he’d move back tomorrow if it weren’t for me and the kids because he knows we’re happy. What do we do?

Coleen says

He’s homesick and he’s probably feeling extra cut off at the moment. I’m missing my family and I’m only an hour away, but I and can’t see them.

Hopefully, when things open up again, he’ll be able to connect with people locally and also visit family and friends back home, and they’ll be able to come and stay or visit.

It’s a really challenging time and especially so if you’ve moved to a new place recently and not really had the opportunity to explore it or even visit the local pub or gym.

If he really hates his job, perhaps he can start to look for something else. If he starts with one thing, it can snowball and all of a sudden everything is looking more positive.

You’re aware of how he’s feeling now, so why not try to do more things as a family? I also think you need to give a relocation at least a couple of years to see if it works. It’s not instant for everyone.