Daily Mirror (Northern Ireland)
Republicans competing to be the most moronic
TEXAS Senator Ted Cruz and new congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene are vying for most moronic US politician of the year and we are only in February.
The Sandy Hook denier placed a sign outside her office mocking Democrat Marie Newman. Marie, whose daughter is transgender, had hung a pride flag next to her door across the hall in protest over Greene’s opposition to an LGBTQ rights bill.
In response, the repulsive Republican posted a large sign outside her door reading: “There are TWO genders: MALE & FEMALE. Trust The Science.”
Trust the science? This from a woman who believes Jewish space lasers caused wildfires. Cruz was criticised after leaving Texans facing blackouts and freezing temperatures to take his family to Mexico.
Arkansas detectives didn’t need to play Guess Who? when investigating a local shooting – the suspects were Stacy Abram, Stacy Abram, Stacy Abram and Stacy Abram. The four men, three of whom have now been nabbed, all share the same name.
“It makes quite a bit confusing,” said Todd Grooms, the chief investigator with the Crittenden County Sheriff’s Department. Stacy Orlando Abram, 27, Stacy Shunta Abram, 31 and Stacy Abram Jr, 68, have all been charged in connection yet police are still searching for Stacy Malcolm Abram.
P.S.
Scholars swotting up in the University of Michigan library had to be turfed out when three venomous spiders turned up in a basement storage area.
America may have got to Mars but it was British ingenuity that saw the Perseverance Rover touch down safely on the Red Planet.
Now it’s emerged the supersonic parachute made in Tiverton, Devon, contained a secret message when it deployed. Systems engineer Ian Clark used a binary code to spell out “Dare Mighty Things” in the orange and white strips of the 70ft canopy.
The oldest resident of her New Jersey nursing home, Lucia Declerck, tested positive for coronavirus on her 105th birthday, one day after her second vaccine shot.
Asked for her secret to defeating Covid she put it all down to the gin-soaked golden raisins she has each morning.
A former Miami lawyer whose trousers caught on fire during a 2017 arson trial has been charged with cocaine possession, authorities said.
Stephen Gutierrez, 32, was pulled over last week. After noticing a bulge in his pocket during a routine traffic stop police found a bag of white powder inside. “That’s cocaine,” he allegedly blurted out.
It’s not even March and it’s safe to say my barman Richard’s 2021 diet has already hit the buffers. This week his wife looked at him and said: “Dieting? You just had three doughnuts.” He replied: “I wanted four. See, dieting.”
A man jailed for helping Mick and Mairead Philpott kill their kids in a house fire is due to be released within weeks after serving half his sentence.
Paul Mosley, 54, got 17 years for manslaughter – but will be out on licence in May after serving eight.
The dad-of-two claims he is innocent. He wrote to a local newspaper: “In May when I am free I will show you the evidence that proves my innocence and shows that I was set up by Derbyshire Police and the witnesses.”
Duwayne Philpott, 13, died alongside his half-sister Jade, 10, and half-brothers Jack, nine, John, eight, Jesse, six and Jayden, five, in the fire in May 2012.
It was started by their dad in a bid to frame his ex-girlfriend and win custody of their children. Philpott, 65, who lived in Derby, was helped by wife Mairead, 39, and family friend Mosley.
They denied involvement but were convicted of manslaughter at Nottingham crown court in 2013. Philpott got life while his wife and Mosley each got 17 years.
There was outrage last year as Mairead was released on licence and handed a new identity after serving just half her term. Midderbyshire MP Pauline Latham said of Mosley’s release: “Once again, the time served for the life of each of those poor children amounts to less than 18 months.”
The Prison Service said: “Sentencing decisions are a matter for the independent judiciary who consider the full facts.”
This is Kevin the hedgehog waking up from hibernation. He and his fellow hedgies are in such sharp decline, they are now on the IUCN Red list of endangered species.
Annette Pyrah who runs the Wildlife Orphanage hedgehog hospital in Barlby near Selby, North Yorks, said: “People have been reporting sightings of hedgehogs for weeks now. The warmer weather means they’re waking from hibernation and looking for food.”
Here are some tips from Annette to welcome our spiky friends from their slumber:
When gardening, check the area before strimming – they cause terrible injuries.
Before replacing an old shed or decking, look underneath as this is where hedgehogs like to hibernate and have babies.
Never offer dried mealworms as they can cause serious metabolic bone disease.
Leave out a shallow bowl of water and kitten biscuits.
Football netting and vegetable netting should be raised so hedgies don’t get caught.
Ponds should have an escape ramp for creatures who fall in by accident.
Make a small gap in your fence so hedgies can roam from one garden to another.
Avoid slug pellets or pesticides – spiky fellas are a gardener’s best friend.
Hedgehogs are nocturnal – if you spot one during the day looking wobbly, it will need help.
When out walking, check for fallen hedgehogs in cattle grids.