I can hear her laughter.. I can picture everything
FROM PAGE ONE announced he is to wed boyfriend Graham Cooper next month, said he often felt Diana’s presence when he was asleep. And he revealed he desperately hoped to hear her giving her blessing to his decision to embrace his sexuality. He added: “I want Diana to say to me ‘It’s OK, Paul, live the life you’ve chosen’. But she’s not here, so all I have got is her in my dreams. “She comes to me on a regular basis. It just happens. We have no control over our subconscious and I go to sleep sometimes thinking ‘Please don’t come into my dreams’ but then she appears.” Paul, 58, said his dreams are often centred on apartments Eight and Nine at Kensington Palace where Diana lived before her death in 1997. Sometimes they were so real he believed he had been transported back there. He added: “We’re there in her rooms and sitting cross-legged on the floor and she’s telling me what’s happening in her world. “She’s asking ‘Can you help me?’ It’s a cry for help sometimes and then at other times we’re sharing fun and laughter. She’ll say ‘When are you going to tell them, Paul, that I’m not actually dead.
“When are you going to tell the world that I’m still here?’
“And I say ‘We’ll put it off for another day. They’re not ready for it. We’ll wait.’”
Paul said he found it unnerving to dream about Diana in such detail but added that he had learned to embrace the experience.
He went on: “I can hear her laughter, which is startling.
“I can picture where everything is in the Palace.
“Which cupboard houses her cashmere sweaters, her desk with all her possessions on it.
“The writing paper, her envelopes, her stationery, the figure of Christ, it’s all in exactly the same place.
“I’m back there in my mind and nothing has changed.
“But she’s in this world of limbo and I don’t know how to help her.
“I’m just comforting her the way I always did.
“There must be someone who understands what it means.
“How can you be touched by an angel and let them go in death?
“It’s impossible.”