I’M 32 AND SO DESPERATE TO MEET A MAN

Dear Coleen

I’m 32 and extremely depressed that I’m still single. Since turning 30, I’ve felt very down about it and I never ever imagined I’d still be on my own at this age – I thought I’d be married with kids by now.

I feel as if I’m being left behind as everyone I know is in a relationship or married, having kids and buying houses while I am stuck in the same place.

I’ve tried everything to meet someone – online, night classes, gym, pubs and clubs – but I never get approached by men and, on the rare occasion I do, they’re either not interested or they’re already attached.

I honestly don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m running out of time as I’d like to have kids.

What should I do to meet a nice man?

Coleen says

I get a lot of letters like yours and I wish I had the magic answer.

First of all, take the pressure off yourself and stop trying so blooming hard. Desperation is probably oozing out of every pore and that’s not sexy.

You’re sizing up every guy you meet as potential husband and father material instead of just getting to know them and having some fun.

The right man for you might turn up in an unexpected place instead of a bar, club or online.

I can only go back to when my first marriage had ended and for several months my niece and sister trawled me around every pub and club until it became quite depressing. Every night there was a sea of men, yet not one of them was right for me.

And then it just happened – I met my second husband when I’d stopped trying and I had stopped caring.

There’s no reason to give up dating apps, for example, but don’t rely on them. You’re doing the right thing putting yourself out there and creating opportunities. But just try to enjoy yourself on nights out rather than expecting Mr Right to show up.