I STILL LOVE MY EX... AND HE LOVES ME

Dear Coleen

I met this guy about five years ago and we just connected instantly. We dated for a while and loved each other, but I broke his heart by telling him I was getting back together with my old boyfriend.

After that, he got a girl pregnant and they moved in together, and now have two children.

But we never stopped being friends and recently all our old feelings resurfaced with a vengeance. I still love him and he is crazy about me. I don’t want to hurt his partner, but I also want to follow my heart. What’s your advice?

Coleen says Are you sure you don’t feel like this again because he’s not available? Or because you’re unattached and he’s offering himself on a plate?

I think you need to look deep inside your soul and ask yourself if you’re being selfish because if this turns out to be a whim or nothing more than a nostalgic romantic fantasy, then you risk hurting a lot of people for nothing. You’ll not only break his heart again, but you’ll ruin the lives of his girlfriend and his kids.

The fact is, he has a partner and two kids – he should be a no-go zone. If I were you, I’d back off and tell him you can’t be friends right now if he still has those feelings for you. You should also be aware that getting back together with an ex is very rarely the romantic dream you’ve imagined.

The fantasy very rarely lives up to the reality – and you quickly remember exactly why they became an ex.