Going nowhere Fast
FAST 8
Cert 12A Running time 136 minutes Stars ★★★
Get your motor running for the long haul, as the formula one of petrol-powered action becomes an endurance rally. Now on its eighth lap since 2001 and with no destination in sight, it’s another rigidly marshalled parade of stagemanaged thrills. As its familiar faces are manoeuvred around a global circuit of locations, they deliver the expected lame banter and homilies on family and respect.
Vin Diesel is back in the driving seat as former criminal and professional street racer Dominic Toretto. While enjoying his honeymoon, he’s blackmailed into betraying his crew and stealing a weapon of mass destruction. As a cyber-terrorist and criminal mastermind called Cipher, Charlize Theron comes equipped with a god complex, a plan worthy of a James Bond villain and a fired-up nuclear sub.
Helen Mirren pops by with a weaponsgrade cockney accent, and Kurt Russell offers more fun than many of the regulars.
Bald buddies Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham are hot on Dom’s trail, leading Dom’s abandoned friends and family.
These minor characters have too little to contribute, and act as a brake when the action needs to accelerate.
As the motorised mayhem moves from the heat of Cuba to the arctic ice of Russia, it’s kept on the road by its hardworking pit team of stunt people, mechanics and CGI wizards.
Fast 8 will have to burn rubber to overtake the turbo-charged success of the previous movie. Furious Seven raced to a colossal £1.2billion at the box office in 2015.
However, it lost the race to be champ that year, coming home behind Jurassic World and Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens.
With Beauty and the Beast already breaking records, I doubt this film will feature in this year’s top three.
Nevertheless, this pile-up of preposterous pandemonium provides robust mechanical fun for its large family of fans.
Cyber-terrorist comes equipped with a god complex, a plan worthy of a James Bond villain and a fired-up nuclear sub