HAVE YOURSELF A MONSTER BALL

The typical Monster rider, if the promo video at the launch was anything to go by, is an achingly handsome young urban hipster dude.

You know, the sort with an achingly beautiful young urban hipster babe girlfriend who climbs on the back as they roar off for a mocha frappuccino in an urban hipster bar that’s so cutting edge it goes out of fashion between when they arrive and when they leave.

All of which made me wonder what I was doing standing in the rain in the South of France. Particularly since the last time I was a young urban hipster dude was the end of the war. Boer War, that is.

Introduced to the Ducati family in 1993 by design genius Miguel Angel Galluzzi, the Monster went on to become Ducati’s most popular model, notching up 315,000 sales in incarnations ranging from 400cc to 1200cc.

This latest version is the new entry-level Monster, coming in at £7,895 which, when you consider that the original Monster 900 was £7,750 back in 1993, makes it a bargain in anyone’s book – particularly since the finish is exquisite and the fittings top class, from the Brembo ABS brakes to classy Pirelli tyres.

Climb aboard and, although the seating position is slightly more relaxed and upright than other Monsters, the view is the same – wide bars, good mirrors (unless like me you’re ridiculously tall), and a neat digital dash with the information and warning lights draped languidly across the top like a bijou Italian Christmas tree.

Switch on, and the air-cooled lump nicked from the company’s Scrambler chortles into life with that lovely syncopated V-twin beat, and with a low seat and a wet weight of only 182kg, low-speed handling is a doddle from the off.

Out on the road, the handling is beautifully neutral, the braking firm and progressive, the clutch delightfully light, and the gearbox firm and positive.

Top marks too to the engine, with a lovely flat torque curve, and 80% of that torque is available from 3,500rpm so you don’t need to wring its neck to get the best out of it.

All in all, a beautifully effortless machine to ride for newbies which will also satisfy more advanced riders who like to press on a bit.

And since every Italian knows that looking good is the most important thing in life, there’s a wide range of matching clothing for young urban hipster dudes.

And the rest of us.