BULLIED AS THEY THINK I’M GAY

Dear Coleen

I’m a single straight guy and I’m feeling bullied because people in my local community think I’m gay.

Just to be clear, I’m not in the slightest bit homophobic, but I feel persecuted to the point where I don’t want to live here any more.

I don’t know whether it’s something to do with my voice or my personality. I was also abused as a teenager by a paedophile.

Why can’t people just leave me alone instead of gossiping and making my life a misery? They need to take a long, hard look at themselves. Please help.

Coleen says

First of all, and I know this is hard if you’re feeling bullied and insecure, but it doesn’t matter what people think. If you’re comfortable in your own skin and with who you are, that’s what counts.

They’re homophobic and are stereotyping gay people. Their attitude speaks volumes about who they are – ignorant and probably not comfortable with themselves.

I’m hoping you’ve had counselling to help you come to terms with the abuse you suffered when you were younger. If not, I think you should speak to your GP about the possibility of being referred to a counsellor.

I think it would help to give you some confidence and build your self-esteem so you’re less bothered by these local gossips.

Bullies generally get bored and back down if you show they’re not affecting you (even if they are). And if you genuinely feel harassed, then get some advice from the local police.

The National Association for People Abused in Childhood (napac.org.uk; 0808 801 0331) also offers support and advice to adult survivors of all types of childhood abuse.

Let me know how you get on.