DAD’S AFFAIR WITH PAL’S MUM

Dear Coleen

Recently it came out that my dad has been having an affair with the mum of one of my closest friends.

My dad was single at the time – he split from my mum when I was 10 and I’m 24 now.

Things have been really bad – my friend’s dad walked out and is living in a rented flat and her mum and my dad are still seeing each other.

My friend hates my dad for the affair and blames him for everything – even though her mum was the one who cheated.

I’m not condoning what my dad did, but at least he was single. In my opinion, they’re both equally to blame.

Now my friend is taking it out on me and won’t see me or talk to me, saying she “needs some space”. I’m not exactly having a great time either.

I understand she’s upset and concerned for her dad. What’s your advice?

Coleen says

I don’t actually think it’s a bad idea to give her some space to lick her wounds and get her head round what’s happened. It sounds as if emotions are running high at the moment.

I’m sure that once she’s had time to think about the situation properly and get over her initial shock and anger, she’ll realise it’s silly to take things out on you.

Your dad and her mum are still together and it could turn into a serious, longterm relationship, so the two of you will have to find a way of working things out.

Why not send her a message, explaining that you understand how upset she is right now and that you respect her request for some space, but tell her that you’re here for her whenever she wants to talk.