OLD FRIENDS ARE IGNORING ME

Dear Coleen

I’m 17 and in sixth form, and have suddenly found myself with no friends.

There’s a group of girls in my class who all dislike me for no apparent reason. I’m not being bullied, but they just ignore me and we used to be pretty good friends.

I have one close friend, but she’s also mates with this group of girls.

I don’t understand it as I didn’t argue with these girls over anything. I suppose I kind of drifted apart from them in the first year of sixth form while they all got closer.

I’ve got another year now before I leave for uni and it feels lonely and miserable going into classes each day.

What do you think?

Coleen says

It’s actually pretty normal to have friends for a few years, then go your separate ways as you get older and your interests and circumstances change.

And, in fact, when you leave school at the end of the year to start college or uni, you will be leaving these girls behind and making new friends. In the meantime, I’d focus on building up new friendships away from this group.

It might be the case that when you move on and it’s clear you’re not bothered, they’ll suddenly show an interest again, but do you really want to be so pally with girls who can pick people up and drop them again so easily? You don’t have to be part of “the gang” – it’s actually way cooler and more attractive to express your individuality and not follow a herd.

You have one really good friend and sometimes that’s all you need. She sounds like a good person because she hasn’t followed the rest of these girls and dropped you like a hot brick.