FOOD

ITV, 9pm BIG BEACH Holiday caters for obese guests

HIDDEN away on a Caribbean island is the world’s only hotel that’s been exclusively built for plus-sized people.

C4, 8pm So we arrive with lots of exclamation marks for this semi-final. We are immediately told that the final decision was “one of the closest calls in tent history!” Paul Hollywood assures it was the “hardest decision in eight years of Bake Off!” And the four remaining bakers are given the “most complicated technical EVER set!”

Hey, there’s really no need to ramp up the drama or yell so much – it’s week nine and we’re invested. This is patisserie week and Stacey, Kate, Sophie and Stephen all want a place in next week’s final.

They are in touching distance of a cookery book deal or a slot on Saturday Kitchen. Well, more specifically, what stands in their way are 24 choux buns, a ridiculously complicated technical of a Belgian Les Misérables cake (insert obvious joke about imminent tragedy), and a sculptural showstopper centrepiece made out of meringue.

Who will crack under the pressure? DESSERT ISLAND Paul, Prue and Noel