SHE SAID MY DAUGHTER IS A FAT PIG

Dear Coleen

My daughter is seven and one of her friends has turned on her and is being very mean.

This girl is trying to turn other girls against her too, and my daughter has come home from school in tears a couple of times.

They used to be best friends so I can’t understand it. How can such young children be this mean?

Should I confront her mum or speak to the school? I don’t want to make a fuss over nothing and I realise that kids have to learn to sort things out for themselves, but the other day this girl called my daughter a fat pig and I think that’s going a step too far.

Any advice?

Coleen says

As a mum of a teenage girl, I’m sorry to tell you that these friendship issues start in infant and primary school and carry on through high school.

It’s hard for parents because you get so upset for them and sometimes angry too and the next minute they’re mates again.

If you’re worried, ask her teacher to keep an eye on the situation and explain that she’s coming home very upset and you don’t want it to affect her time in school or her work.

The teacher might suggest giving a talk in class about namecalling and the importance of being kind to each other.

To be honest, good schools are really hot on these issues and will usually take action to nip things in the bud.

And if you’re in the playground waiting for your daughter and see this other girl’s mum, why not just say: “Any idea what’s happened between the two of them because they seem to have fallen out.”

But at this stage I wouldn’t make too big a fuss of it as this could also upset your daughter.

Plus, kids tend to come home with their version of events, but sometimes when you delve deeper, there’s another side to it.