SAD AT HOW SISTER’S CHANGED

Dear Coleen

My sister and I used to be very close but in the last year we’ve completely grown apart, mostly due to her older boyfriend.

She’s also gone to uni now, but whenever she comes home I realise we have absolutely nothing in common.

I find her selfish, rude and high maintenance, and she’s changed so much from being quite fun to just boring, and panders to her boyfriend’s every whim.

I find her really hard to tolerate and I think she views her boyfriend’s sister as more of a sister than I am. I’d love us to be close again but I don’t know how to go about it, as spending time with each other is just awkward. And it’s hard to go anywhere without the boyfriend or his sister in tow. How do I fix our relationship before it’s too late?

Coleen says

We don’t always like the people our loved ones choose for a partner – that’s life I’m afraid. Also, it’s pretty normal when someone gets a partner or goes to university to see less of them. I’m sure when the novelty of a new relationship and new college has worn off a bit, as it will in time, your sister will be more available. It’s a big change for you and understandable that you’re missing her, so why not be honest and tell her that. Say you feel a bit left out and even a bit jealous. She probably hasn’t realised how you feel, as she’s so wrapped up with all the changes in her life. Suggest a day out together where it’s just the two of you. Be the bigger person and make the first move.