I’M DREADING MY NEPHEW STAYING OVER

Dear Coleen

My brother and sister-in-law are coming to stay over Christmas with their son who is four and a real brat (sorry!).

The problem is he’s an only child and very spoilt, so there aren’t many boundaries and he thinks he can do as he pleases.

Our daughter is five and she gets quite stressed when he’s around. He won’t share, he snatches toys, he hits and is generally a nightmare.

Any ideas on how we can help things go smoothly?

They are staying for two days and I’m worried I’ll snap and tell them what I think of their son and their parenting skills.

Coleen says

This is a really tricky situation. I wouldn’t accuse them of being terrible parents, but if your nephew is upsetting your daughter or doing things he shouldn’t in your house, then I think you are entitled to say, “You’re not allowed to do that here.”

And if your brother or his wife respond by saying they allow him to behave like that at home, just make the point he’s not at home and he’s upsetting your daughter.

However, if his brattish behaviour is directed towards them and they’re putting up with it, then let them get on with it and don’t interfere.

You can probably put up with that for a short time, but if he’s being a bully then talk to your nephew directly.