MUM’S HIT 70 AND WORRIES ALL THE TIME

Dear Coleen

My mum has become a real worrier in later life. She’s 70 and over the past few years it’s as if she’s had a personality transplant.

She used to be quite adventurous and loved travelling, but now it’s a struggle to get her out of the house to visit me – and I’m only five miles down the road.

She’s also obsessing about her friends and neighbours, who leave their bins out too long, park across her drive and so on. She really worries about this stuff and it’s taking over her life.

My dad died five years ago and I don’t know whether that has something to do with it, but how can I make her see that the things she worries about are trivial and don’t have to affect her life?

Coleen says

She might be having a little life crisis. These can happen at all stages and I don’t think it’s that unusual at your mum’s age.

Her husband is no longer here, she’s just hit her seventies, she might be thinking about her own mortality and be worried about what she’s going to do with the rest of her life.

Sit with her and ask what worries her. Tell her you’re missing the fantastic, enthusiastic person who used to love life and you’re wondering why she’s lost her mojo.

And maybe encourage her to do things with you rather than on her own to help get her out of her current rut and start enjoying life more – days out or a weekend away, for example.

She might just need someone to come along and distract her from the day-to-day and remind her of what a great person she is and that there’s still plenty to enjoy.