I DON’T WANT A BABY BUT HE DOES

Dear Coleen desperation and I can see things from his side, too.

However, you can’t have a baby just because you feel bad for someone – if you do, you could end up resenting him and the baby. If the baby keeps you up all night, or juggling work becomes a struggle, you’ll be tempted to snap, “You were the one who wanted all this”.

I say it a lot, but that’s because it’s true: babies are tough on a relationship, even when both people desperately wanted them. If one person is less keen, they can cause huge problems.

It’s all very well if he’s said he’ll do the night feeds, but he has no idea how tough babies and toddlers are. He’s walked into your life when your kids are way past that stage and probably lovely company.

If you really don’t want a baby, then you have to be honest and accept that it might mean losing him.