And so to the 5 BIG QUESTIONS of the week

1 The Spice Girls to play at the wedding of a Nazi fancy dress enthusiast and a Suits actress with Sarah Ferguson possibly there. Can this get any less classier?

2 If your dog does a job in a frozen park today is it OK to fling it across the lake and say to any objectors that you’re practising your curling skills?

3 Anyone think Elton John’s mum didn’t leave him any cash in her will as he would only have spent it on flowers and some dying people think that’s a waste?

4 A raisin shortage means fewer hot cross buns on sale at Easter. UKIP will still blame it on the PC lobby not wanting to upset muslims though, won’t they?

5 If you’ve forgotten all the contradictory reports claiming wine gives you/saves you from dementia, is that the first sign of Alzheimer’s?