Coleen says

You’re right, you shouldn’t be arguing in front of the kids. If she seems unable to alter her behaviour right now, then you have to be the bigger person and walk away if things get heated and the children are in the room.

It sounds to me as if she’s stressed and unhappy, so you have to get to the root of why that is.

Rather than get drawn into an argument, ask calmly why she’s so angry and what’s making her so miserable. Tell her you’re willing to listen and support her, but right now her anger is threatening your relationship and it’s also creating a toxic environment for the children.

I think it’s very hard to sort out unless she’s willing to be honest about why she’s reacting to every situation with anger.

You could suggest relationship counselling, which might at least prove to her how serious you are about finding a solution.

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