SON AGED 4 RUINING MARRIAGE

Dear Coleen

My daughter and her husband have a gorgeous four-year-old son who won’t stay in his own bed at night, so they’re getting no sleep and she’s admitted it’s starting to affect their relationship.

When they put him down, he calls out to go to the toilet or says he’s hungry or thirsty and, if they don’t do his bidding, he screams the place down.

Then, when he does fall asleep, he wakes up through the night and comes into their room, and invariably ends up spending the night in their bed. Any advice on what they can do? They constantly snap at each other.

Coleen says I’m sure they know having him in their bed is not the answer, but They should also agree to take it in turns to get up with their son on alternate nights so at least one of them is getting some sleep.

And perhaps you can help by offering to have your grandson for sleepovers at the weekend – and you can reinforce the routine too.

I had the same problem with my son Shane. When he was about to start school we made a bug fuss of doing up his room and something just clicked for him – he probably wanted to start behaving more like a ‘big boy’.

So your daughter could also try to involve her son in changing his room to make it more appealing.

Finally, most behavioural issues like this are ‘just a phase’ and kids do grow out of it.