FAMOUS FIVE

Five things that are guaranteed to happen in today’s Grand National

1 At least four people will text you saying they backed the winner. You will not be happy for them 2 The horse you draw in the office sweep will never get a mention — today or ever again 3 Your aunt will back the winner with her only bet of the year, because she liked the name 4 The winning jockey will be breathless, mud splattered and not as happy as you’d think 5 The stable lass will pat the winning horse on the nose at least 12 times