BOYFRIEND IS ANGRY THAT I MET HIS EX

Dear Coleen

I’ve been seeing a great guy for a few months and I’m in love with him. However, I wasn’t happy with the fact that he wanted to remain friends with his ex, who he was in a relationship with for five years.

I had a tough time accepting it, but I was honest with him and tried to discuss it. He just kept saying I was overreacting.

In the end, I called his ex and we met up for a chat. I thought it was a sensible thing to do and we left on good terms, but my boyfriend has gone ballistic.

He says I’ve “ruined everything” and he’s not sure he wants to be with me any more. We haven’t spoken in a week and I’m so upset.

Can I make things right?

Coleen says

Maybe he’s so angry because you’ve gone behind his back to speak to his ex and you’ve behaved like you don’t trust him.

I kind of get that. However, I don’t think you do trust him and believe 100% that he’s over his ex, and that’s the issue you need to confront him with.

Ask him is why he’s so angry if they’re just friends and why he doesn’t want to include you.

Is he being honest that he’s over her and sure that he’s not trying to cling on to this relationship?

Perhaps once he’s had time to think things over, he’ll be more willing to have an honest conversation. I believe you have every right to question why he wants to remain so close to his ex, but I think the way you went about it is what’s made him so furious.