POLLYOMETER

Going up... Fromage homage

Bad news. Whatever you’ve got for your dad just became rubbish, because this is the best Father’s Day present ever.

Kraft took bids for charity, and five winners get a sculpture of their dad, made out of cheese. Imagine looking at his face as he looks at his face, and then eats it – presumably sharing it with you, if he’s the kind of guy who warrants this level of gift. Wins all round.

Mountain rescued dog

A dog called Kato had to be rescued by firefighters and stretchered back during a hike in Colarado. He had become “exhausted” and “dehydrated” because dogs are idiots.

A cat would never do that. And not just because a cat would never dream of going on a hike in the first place.

Going down... Bum steer

The bum bag is back. I mean, obviously. But the new twist is that now it’s called a Triple B, because it’s a Backwards Bum Bag, which you wear the other way round, ie on your bum.

Finally the name makes sense. Nothing else about this does, but at least that’s something.

Toe good

Talk about niche product. Apparently there are enough people in the world who rate foot flexibility so highly they’re willing to wear these stomach-churning Separator Socks. So now stomach-churning Separator Socks are widely – although not as widely as they’ll pull your toes apart – available.

Just no.