HE USES JOB AS EXCUSE TO DRINK
Dear Coleen
My husband has always enjoyed a drink and is often the life and soul of a party. He’s 45 and has worked in sales and client entertaining for years, so socialising and drinking is a big part of his job.
However, in the last few years I’ve become worried his drinking is getting out of control.
His mum died 18 months ago after a long illness, and I’m concerned he’s drinking instead of dealing with it. His job is also very pressurised and there have been a spate of redundancies, which I know he’s worried about.
He’s drinking heavily around five nights a week, and a few times he’s drunk so much he’s been sick. When I confront him about this he says taking clients out is part of his job. But I keep arguing that it doesn’t mean he
Coleen says
I think you need to sit him down, be honest and say, “I think you have a drink problem”. Fair enough, he has to take clients out, but that doesn’t mean he has to get smashed and falling down drunk. And it’s not very
professional that he’s taking clients out and drinking so much he’s being sick.
You’re right, he is using his job as an excuse for drinking so much. But instead of being aggressive or shouting, just tell him you love him and you’re worried he’s drinking too much.
You could suggest he cut his drinking down to three days a week, and then two, and then once a week. After all, he doesn’t have to drink when he goes out with clients.
Or he could have one or two, or have lime and soda water and pass it over as a G&T or vodka. He can still take clients out and limit his drinking.
If he doesn’t, and digs his heels in, then alarm bells should ring and you should tell him he needs to get help. For more information, visit alcoholicsanonymous.org.uk.