MY 35-YEAR MARRIAGE TO WRONG MAN

Dear Coleen

I’ve been married to my husband for 35 years, but I knew after only six months that it was wrong and that I shouldn’t be with him.

Now I’ve finally decided I want to leave him, but I have no job and no money of my own, so have no idea what I’m supposed to do. I feel really sad that I’ve ended up in this situation. What’s your advice?

Coleen says

You’ve given up 35 years of your life for something that you’ve been too scared to walk away from, and I don’t think you should spend the rest of your life being scared.

Happiness and your peace of mind are priceless, and while it might be hard to start with to find a solution, it’s even harder staying in a situation that makes you so unhappy.

There is always a way out if you look for it. Firstly, after 35 years you won’t be walking away with nothing from this marriage financially.

Secondly, once you start opening up to friends you’ll discover there are people willing to step up and support you in lots of ways – emotionally and practically.

Citizens Advice has good information on divorce and separation (visit citizensadvice. org.uk).

But you also need to have a conversation with your husband and explain how you feel and what you want, which I know is a hard thing to do.

It’s never too late to start again. I know – in fact my upcoming tour is called It’s Never Too Late!

If you can face those fears and take things one baby step at a time, I promise your life will open up to lots of possibilities again.

Good luck.