I hated letting paying public down... but all I wanted to do was cuddle my dying dad
Sheridan Smith on finding happiness again after tragedy
SHERIDAN SMITH ON TURNING THINGS AROUND IN HER CAREER ACTRESS Sheridan Smith has opened up about her struggle with work and guilt after learning her dad was terminally ill, and coping with his death.
The singer, 37, pulled out of a performance of her sold-out West End run in Funny Girl when Colin found he had cancer.
She said: “As soon as my dad got that diagnosis it was like, ‘I’m not leaving your side, I’m not leaving you’.
“My mum, God love her, was like, ‘Well, you’ve got to get back, you’ve got the show, you can’t let people down’, and rightly so.
“People had bought tickets a year in advance and I hate letting people down. They’ve taught me that the show goes on, even if they’re ill and I get that.
“But at the time I was like, ‘Hang on, reality check. I don’t want to leave my dad’.”
MELTDOWN
Sheridan went on: “I got on the train to do the show and I thought, ‘I can’t do it’. I just thought, ‘I want to be sat with my dad, sat on his chair cuddling him and that’.”
After missing the show in March 2016, Sheridan took time off for stress and exhaustion, before reprising the role that July. Colin died in the December.
Sheridan said: “I kind of lost it a bit after he died. I had a massive meltdown.
“I’ve come out the other side now and I need to get it all out through my music.”
The star released her self-titled album of pop classics in October last year then went on a nationwide tour earlier this year before heading back to the recording studio.
She said of the music: “There is that kind of northern, keep calm and carry on vibe and it’s very British as well, we’re all like that. I think everyone can relate to it.”
She opens up in ITV documentary Sheridan Smith: Coming Home, in which she returns to the area where she grew up.
Fiance Jamie Horn joins her on the poignant trip, and reflects on his recent proposal. Recalling how he asked her, “You going to marry me or what?”, Jamie said: “I pulled it out the bag. It felt natural, effortless, that’s how I felt about it. You probably thought, ‘Lazy b ***** d’.”
Sheridan debuts her second album, A Northern Soul, in front of family and friends at Bentley Top Club, her dad’s favourite social club in Doncaster, South Yorks.
Colin, a banjo player, formed country duo The Daltons with Sheridan’s mum Marilyn.
Sheridan said: “To be back here, in Dad’s club... it means so much that you’ve all come out tonight. This is it. This is home.”
■ Sheridan Smith: Coming Home, Sunday at 9.30pm on ITV. FIANCE Jamie Horn joins Sheridan’s trip is on
I lost it a bit, I’ve come out the other side and need to get it all out through music