WHAT WE’VE GOT ISN’T ENOUGH

Dear Coleen

I’m a man in my late 20s and I’m not sure whether to leave my girlfriend and move on.

I have a typical dream scenario – a gorgeous girlfriend and great sex. But, even though things are good in bed and she’s a really nice girl, I don’t feel anything deeper. It worries me that if I stay with her, I’ll miss out on meeting someone I really connect with.

I’m quite shy and not great at chatting up women, so I worry I won’t meet anyone. Most of my friends have serious girlfriends and I don’t see them so much. I’d like a relationship with the same kind of commitment.

Coleen says

If you feel deep down that you don’t want to be with this girl, then don’t just settle. Weeks, months and years will tick by, then if you do meet someone you connect with it’ll be a lot harder to end the relationship and will cause more heartache.

You know that something is missing, something you can’t put your finger on – it’s the X factor that makes a relationship really special and it just feels right.

So on paper you might seem perfect for each other, but if the chemistry isn’t there, then it won’t stand the test of time. I think you just have to be honest with yourself about what you want.

You were shy when you met this girl, but you did attract her, so you should have confidence that you can do that again with someone else.

But don’t become fixated about what your friends are up to – focus on what’s right for you.