DON’T WANT CHILD ON INSTAGRAM

Dear Coleen

My daughter is 13 and wants an Instagram account. So far, we’ve said no, but she asks about it all the time, saying all her friends have one and she feels left out.

I really worry about some of the posts she might see and also about the threat of being groomed online after all the stories I’ve read in the papers.

I want her to have a phone for safety, as she travels to secondary school on the bus, but I don’t want her on social media. Can you advise?

Coleen says

Listen, I get how you feel. We live in a very different world from the one we knew as 13-year-olds and it’s hard to get your head around all this stuff. However, you are the parent so, if you don’t want her to have an account just yet, stick to your guns.

Social media can be a scary and confusing place. When I was getting trolled recently I came off Twitter and Facebook but wanted to stay on Instagram because I like sharing photos.

My daughter stopped all the trolling with the click of a button so that unless I’m following someone, they can’t comment on my posts. It’s worth looking into all the privacy settings, or find someone who is tech-savvy to show you how it all works.

You could also set up your own account – you don’t have to use it, but you can keep an eye on what your daughter is posting and become familiar with the site. If she knows you’re monitoring what she’s doing, she’ll inevitably be more sensible. It might reassure you if you feel in control of it.

She can have a private account and only accept followers whom she knows, like her school friends. Also, talk to her about the potential dangers.

There’s also lots of good safety advice for parents online (check out www.net-aware.org. uk/networks/instagram).