WAS MOVING IN TOGETHER A BIG ERROR?

Dear Coleen

My boyfriend and I are both 23 and moved in together six months ago. At the time my parents were concerned because we’d only been together a few months and they also felt I was still quite young to cope with that kind of pressure and responsibility.

I didn’t listen to them of course because I was head over heels in love (and still am). However, their advice has comeback to haunt me because I spend most of my time arguing with my boyfriend.

I’ve become quite possessive and hate it when he goes out without me. He’s also suddenly stopped making any effort to be romantic, although our sex life is still passionate. We love each other but could we have made a mistake?

The other issue is, he runs back to his mum every time we have a row, which she just revels in!

Coleen says

You might have great sexual chemistry but there’s a lot more to a relationship than that. When the passion drops a notch, as it inevitably does when you’re been together a while, what are you going to be left with?

Are you prepared to talk about what’s going wrong and how to solve it? All relationships, however good they are, require some effort and nurturing. If your boyfriend is mature enough to live with a woman then he ought to be mature enough to stay and sort things out rather than run back to his mum.

Moving in together has provided you both with a big wake-up call. It might be a good idea to have a bit of time apart and see if you miss each other. Another option is to continue as a couple without living together and see how that goes.