TORY 11 HAVE NO LOVE FOR THE TRUTH

And so summer really gets going... with a group of narcissistic half-wits battling it out for victory.

No, not Love Island – I’m talking about the Tory leadership contest. And think yourself lucky they don’t do it in their swimming cossies. The number of Tory leadership candidates had reached 13. Unlucky for some. Well, unlucky for everyone. But then James Cleverly and Kit Malthouse got as bored of the whole fandango as the rest of us and threw in the towel.

Leaving 11 MPs busily out-Torying each other in their quest for power. There’s Sajid Javid offering to scrap top rate income tax for the richest while suddenly realising we do need police after all to fight crime. Then there’s Dominic Raab also offering the Conservative catnip of tax cuts.

Boris Johnson is promising more money for (largely Tory shire) schools, although we know Boris’s cash promises aren’t worth the buses they’re printed on.

Meanwhile, Jeremy Jeremy Hunt Hunt is is offering cash for defence, Rory Stewart cash for climate and Esther McVey cash for crime.

Who knew there was still so much money stashed on that magic money tree? Will they do any of it? Probably not. But now Boris has normalised lying as the preferred means of communication within his party I guess the rest are thinking “Well if you can’t beat him...” This lot would ould sell their grannies – and their souls – to get their hands on power. But there is one thing the British people need more than any tax cuts or funding promises.

And it’s the he one one thing thi outside of their gift... a little honesty.