You’ll like this job.. it’s like being shot out of a cannon backwards
THE green room, which is never green, was empty.
Rosters and schedules were pinned to the noticeboard with the famous EastEnders logo emblazoned on them.
I checked the time, opened my script again, which I had marked up, and silently ran through my lines. A voice pierced the silence: “Are you new?”
She didn’t wait for a response but walked over to one of the phones. It was Gretchen Franklin, who played the pub’s ancient Cockney cleaning lady, Ethel, famous for her on-screen pug Willy.
Gretchen had been in the business for years and had started out as a variety artist with her parents. I stood up and extended my hand, which she ignored. “Yes, I am new,” I replied. She spoke into the phone: “It’s me. Gretchen. Could you order my car, dear?” She put the phone down and headed for the door, saying over her shoulder: “You’ll enjoy this job. It’s like being shot out of a cannon backwards. You never know where you’re going to end up!” Then she was gone.
There was a flurry of activity in the corridor. A young woman with a clipboard stood in the doorway. “Right, we’re ready for you.” As I stood up June Brown appeared in the room. She played the downtrodden and hilariously funny Dot Cotton.
“Oh hello, dear,” she said. “Are you the gay one? I mean, you know dear, Colin. It is Colin, isn’t it?”
She drew deeply on the cigarette that was pressed to her lips. With the reprimand of “June!” from the assistant, I was led away to rehearse my first scenes in EastEnders.
Once rehearsals were over on that first morning I made my way back to the green room. June Brown was still there, the air thick with smoke as she puffed away and chatted on the phone.
I started for the door. “Just a minute, dear,” she shouted at me, then finished the call with an abrupt “I’ll phone you back.”
“Fancy lunch, dear? Mike isn’t it? We could go over to the canteen.”
Everyone welcomed me. They were kind, down-to-earth people. But you could never get over suddenly meeting someone that you knew so well on screen, but you actually didn’t know at all.
The next morning everything went smoothly. Then, just before two o’clock, we were told to stand by for the producer’s run when suddenly a large cream poodle appeared at the far end of the corridor and started running full pelt towards us. It was Roly, the show’s famous pub dog.
Adam Woodyatt, who played Ian Beale, jumped to his feet and shouted: “She’s coming!” People fled in all different directions, except a few diehards.
Part of the show’s attraction was its attention to detail; the rooms that characters inhabited reflected their lives and their experiences. Nothing was placed by chance, it had to mean something.
Even after all my years as an actor I wasn’t prepared for the thrill of my first day on the actual Square. Seeing it without anyone filming gave it a stronger sense of reality. It was like someone had lifted the place from the East End and dropped it there.
■ Copyright © Michael Cashman 2020.Extracted from
One Of Them: From
Albert Square to Parliament Square, published by Bloomsbury on Feb 6 at £18.99.
I wasn’t prepared for the thrill of my first day on the Square