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IT’S BEEN 17 YEARS AND I’M STILL FURIOUS AT ALAN RICKMAN FOR BUYING THAT OFFICE TART A NECKLACE AND BREAKING EMMA THOMPSON’S HEART

Staggering in from the high street with my shopping bags and gasping for a cuppa, it occurred to me that Christmas would be a whole lot easier if we didn’t have to do the giving thing – just do the eating, drinking and being merry bit.

I mean, I don’t really need another pair of gloves. I got five pairs a few years ago, and my hands haven’t grown since then.

And I really don’t want any more Cliff Richard calendars that my best mate buys me every year as a joke. I still haven’t recovered since one year’s flasher edition when he got his kit off way before May was out.

So when I got a lovely card from Margaret Dixon in Skellingthorpe, Lincoln, and a letter to say how much our readers’ memories of their childhood festivities reminded her of her own, it was a joy to hear about the real meaning of Christmas.

She writes: “There were six of us children at the time. We also made paper chains as decorations and I remember fabric trimmings being strung across the ceiling.

“We also had to cut snips to make a new snipped rug which we had every year in front of the fire as we only had lino on the floor. We also had a gramophone and had to take turns at winding it up.

“My dad used to make some of our toys for Christmas presents and I remember one of my brothers running across the floor pushing a wooden train he’d made with shoe polish tins for wheels – and one of them flew off!

“In those days we were pleased with what we got. Now it’s all I want this or I want that!

“Sadly there are only four of us left now, but we still get together to talk about the old days. At least we always had food on the table.”

Tell us your funny tinsel tales or just the warm memories of a bygone Christmas.

Email me at siobhan.mcnally@mirror. co.uk or write to Community Corner,

PO Box 791, Winchester

Disturbing news reaches me that 64% of the nation haven’t bought their Christmas dinner ingredients let alone started boiling their Brussels sprouts yet. How will they be the traditional big mushy mess for Christmas Day if you don’t all get a wriggle on?

With just five days to go, worried bean counters at Admiral Insurance are concerned that this slack attitude will lead to Christmas lunch being memorable for all the wrong reasons – like having to make do with a tin of spaghetti hoops instead of a turkey when everything runs out at the shops.

The festive investigation by the insurer found 42% of you are planning to stock up today but a shocking 17% of you are totally flying by the seat of your pants and won’t be doing g your shopping till the 23rd, 3rd, and a monstrous 5% of you on Christmas Eve. Yes, blokes, you know who you are!

So the insurer has teamed up with a professional TV home economist to produce a handy food calculator on their website at admiral.com/magazine/ guides/home/christmas-food-calculator to help you create the perfect amount of Christmas dinner.

With two-thirds of households in the UK ending up with more food than they need at Christmas and far too many people throwing stuff into the bin, the calculator will help you work out how much of each key ingredient you need to cater for your number of guests.

Obviously it can’t build in the extras that I call “the cook’s tax” which is having to taste at least several roasties and pigs in blankets to make sure they’re perfect, and knocking back the rest of the wine that doesn’t go in the gravy.

Although with Admiral’s research revealing that one in five of us have our first alcoholic drink before 11am on Christmas Day, is it any wonder that over half of its claims in December involve red wine spillages.

Obviously the way to avoid these disasters is to drink bubbly at 11.01am! Yes I know – I’m almost like a public service.