WORRIED MY WIFE FANCIES SOMEONE ELSE

Dear Coleen

I’m a man in my 70s and my wife has become close to another (single) man, whom she invites over to the garden at every opportunity for a cup of tea or a drink.

At first, I didn’t mind – she said he was lonely and desperate for company and he seemed a nice enough person.

However, I’m now starting to worry that there’s more to it and that my wife likes this man more than just a friend.

I can’t believe I’m in this situation at my age and after more than 40 years of marriage. What do you think I should do?

Coleen says

You’re never too old to feel jealous or worried and I actually think it’s lovely that you’re not taking your wife for granted. She might even be thrilled if you admit to her that you’re a little bit jealous!

I can reassure you until the cows come home, but you need to hear it from her.

Her initial reaction might be “Don’t be daft!”, but just explain that he’s over a lot, so naturally you began to wonder if there was more to this friendship than meets the eye.

She might admit that she enjoys his company and he makes her feel good because he’s interested in what she has to say, so if that’s the case, take it on board.

All relationships, however solid, need attention and nurture.

I hope that if I meet someone to share my life with and we get to our 70s, he still cares about me enough to be concerned about another fella coming over for a cuppa.

You could even tell your wife the situation has made you realise how important she is to you and that you’d hate to lose her – it’ll make her feel great.