Let’s do this together
Let me introduce you to Xyron – or Ronnie to normies who don’t play Dungeons & Dragons.
The Dark Lord’s special 15th birthday present arrived on Thursday and has since turned our house upside down with his big blue eyes and tough guy attitude, which doesn’t fool anyone – least of all the dog.
Ragdoll kitten Ronnie moves too quickly to get a decent shot, but in this photo, he’s just spotted Bozza and started growling at him.
Bozza is completely unmoved – but very excited about the prospect of “treats” from another kitten litter tray. Less amused and a bit scared of the growly kitten, our calico mog Dan Dan scarpered at the sight of the small, white, fluffy boss cat, but I reckon by the end of the weekend, they’ll be friends.
I’m a bit worried the half-feral Dan Dan will take indoor cat Ronnie out clubbing, but we’re just taking the meeting times slowly for now for everyone to get used to each other.
Since Dan Dan isn’t much of a lap cat, I thought it would be good for TDL to have a special pet of her own, and rag dolls are known to be the most gentle and docile of creatures. But if that’s the case, I want my money back – because pocket-rocket Ronnie is a monster!
“Considering his tiny size, it’s amazing how much power Ron wields,” I said to TDL, as I tried to pry him out of her clutches so I could have a cuddle.
“That’s why I called him Xyron – he’s my DnD character,” explained TDL, as she indulgently fed him the world’s most expensive tiny titbits, probably made from the larks’ tongues.
Then she said seriously: “And don’t you call him Ron Ron – I don’t want him to have a silly name like Dan Dan.”
“But you can’t call him Ron,” I argued. “Just like you can’t call a cat Dan – so that’s why she’s Dan Dan.”
So we agreed on Ronnie, although Xyron Chaos War Demon is more fitting at the moment as the evil minion has already chewed through several PC cables in TDL’s room (which I secretly applaud) and the downstairs loo now looks like a post-apocalyptic dustbowl as he uses the scatter gun method in the litter tray.
But we adore him and when Dan Dan comes down off the ceiling, she’s going to love him too.
■ Email siobhan.mcnally@mirror.co.uk or write to Community Corner, PO Box 791, Winchester SO23 3RP.