Cough with her head
Prankster hands May her P45 during a splutter shambles of a speech to the Tory conference
THERESA May was handed her jotters during an excruciating make-or-break speech as Prime Minister yesterday.
A prankster confronted her on the podium of the Tory conference hall and gave her a mock P45 announcing her redundancy.
The comedian Lee Nelson – real name Simon Brodkin – said: “Boris asked me to give you this,” before being ejected from the hall.
The PM took the incident in her stride with an ad-lib about sacking Jeremy Corbyn.
But things went from bad to worse when a prolonged coughing fit left May suffering a spluttering stage death.
The Prime Minister repeatedly dried up during the agonising hour-long speech.
It was left to the Tory faithful to nurse their beleaguered leader across the finish line with applause breaks, while TV viewers cringed over the long, debilitating pauses.
In a conference day of dark symbolism, letters from the conference slogan behind May fell off the wall as she ploughed on through coughing fits.
There was massive sympathy for the Tory leader in the hall and a roaring ovation for how she remained composed when confronted by the prankster.
The speech cast the shadow of lingering death over May’s premiership, which was already ailing badly after Cabinet Brexit splits and a disastrous general election.
An announcement about her mission for her remaining time in office – £2billion of new funding for council housing in England – got lost in the drama.
A move to cap prices in the energy market – a policy borrowed from Labour’s Ed Miliband – was forgotten.
And a celebration of saving the Union – “the threat of a second referendum denied”– fell victim to the croak in May’s throat.
Attacks on Corbyn and rare displays of heartfelt passion by May were swept away.
At one point, the Chancellor handed her a cough sweet. She joked it was the only time Philip Hammond would give anything away for free.
But the coughing soon returned. The character Bob Fleming from The Fast Show, who coughs his way through Country Matters, couldn’t have done it better.
At several points during the speech, which was the culmination of the four-day conference in Manchester, May’s voice almost disappeared. The Prime Minister was reduced to reading, rather than delivering, a speech that should have marked her recovery but instead heralded her demise.
She began by apologising to her party for her performance in the botched campaign for this year’s snap general election.
May admitted the campaign was “too scripted, too presidential” and said she took responsibility for its shortcomings.
As she went on, she promised a “British Dream for a new generation of young people” who feel they have been locked out of economic progress.
But that turned out to be a commitment to build 25,000 new homes over five years – far too few for the 1.2million on the waiting list in England.
In what had been planned as a personal and passionate address to relaunch her as Prime Minister, May won massive sympathy when she opened up about herself.
She won a standing ovation as she said: “It has always been a great sadness to me and Philip that we were never blessed with children. It seems some things in life are just never meant to be.
“But I believe in the dream that life should be better for the next generation as much as any mother, any father, any grandparent.”
May took aim at Corbyn,
who, according to polls, would win an election if one was held now.
She said the choice between Labour and the Tories was now a battle between those who see free markets as “no longer fit for purpose” and those who recognise them as “the greatest agent of collective human progress ever created”.
The PM told activists: “Let us win this argument for a new generation and defend free and open markets with all our might.”
May promised draft legislation for an energy price cap – the Labour policy denounced as “Marxist” by the Tories as recently as 2013.
At the end, she was given resounding applause and husband Philip came on stage and gave her a comforting hug.
Police said later that Brodkin had legitimate accreditation to be at the conference.
Guidance on the conference website said all attendees must have approval from the party and be accredited by police.
Chief Superintendent John O’Hare said: “The man was arrested to prevent a breach of the peace and was released a short time later.
“He had legitimate accreditation which granted him access to the conference site. We will be reviewing the accreditation process with the Conservative Party.”