Five million Scots go steaming in for study
TALKING of which, three members of Donald Trump’s closest advisers have been arrested over claims they’re too close to Russia. Trump claims this is fake news against his friends Boris, Ivan and Vladimir. A UNIVERSITY are paying volunteers to get steaming then hungover as part of a study into how drink affects us. So far in Scotland five million folk have signed up.
Early results show two drinks make you forgetful, four drinks make you sick and six drinks make you tweet out the winner of Bake Off before they’ve been announced.
Aye poor old Prue Leith tweeted the result nine hours before the show aired. I’m not saying she was panicking afterwards but it wasn’t just the scones that had a soggy bottom. It was all down to the time difference. Prue was on holiday in the remote country of Bhutan which is behind the UK. By around 400 years.
The Bake Off finale was seen by a live audience of 7.3 million people, many of whom were inspired to go off and bake loads of rock cakes. To chuck at Prue the next time she tries to log on to Twitter.
Viewers say they’ve been won over by the new hosts, especially loving the way Noel presented those amazingly bizarre creations. Not the cakes obviously, his mental clothes.
Sticking with food, an awardwinning French chef says we’re spoiling school dinners. Fred Berkmiller says Scottish schools should encourage pupils to try foods they haven’t eaten before.
Like fruit. Nah, he’s actually wanting to serve snails and fish heads. It’s thought it will combat obesity. Mainly because nobody wants to eat snails or fish heads.
In fairness, French schoolkids don’t have an obesity problem. Mainly because after a few glasses of wine, they don’t care what they eat for lunch.
As spoilers go, those are nothing. The one I worry about is Donald Trump announcing the winner of World War III the day before he starts it.
We all like a wee spoiler though. A new survey says more than half of us cheat at life in some way. Ways we cheat include stealing stuff from a buffet, googling pub quiz answers and getting the Russians to rig an election for you.
When my pal goes to the toilet, I like ● KATE Middleton has revealed that she is teaching Prince George to play tennis. The hard part is getting him to learn how to serve… Apparently, he keeps thinking he should have a butler to do it for him. to sneak a peek at his cards. But it’s well tricky to remember the long number on the front and the three digits on the back.
Anyway, in case you’re wondering who the real winner is after Prue’s tweet, well it’s pretty obvious really. Spoiler alert – it’s Mary Berry. ● THE chief designer for the fashion house Burberry is to step down. It’s rumoured he’s being paid to leave. With several small cheques. ● SAINSBURY’S are launching their own record label and releasing a series of albums. So shoppers can now look forward to buying records by the likes of Radiobread, Tofu Fighters and Tuna Turner.