Vet emergency for wally dug
ANIMAL news and a pet labrador had to be rushed to the vet after swallowing a set of false teeth in East Kilbride.
The vet said the dog had a lucky escape … as he was no longer in East Kilbride.
Vets also performed life saving surgery on a greedy cat that swallowed a rat.
They then rushed to the aid of an old lady who swallowed a fly and thought she’d die.
But by the time they arrived she’d self medicated by swallowing a bird, a cat, a dog, a goat and a horse.
Circuses have been banned from using wild animals in Scotland. The subject had previously been the elephant in the room. Which has now been replaced by a confused clown.
A baby donkey is to spend Christmas in a Scottish family’s home after being rejected by its mum. When asked what they were buying the donkey for Christmas, the family simply said: “Hee haw”.
Norwegian farmers have warned against reintroducing the Lynx to Scotland.
They are obviously advising that it stick to its more natural environment – teenage boys’ bedrooms. Of course, they only return after previously being wiped out by the Anne Robinson method – getting rid of the Weakest Lynx.
Finally, a 3.5billion-year-old animal fossil is the oldest ever sign of life identified by scientists. Vince Cable is in the running to be best ever leader of the Lib Dems. ● HOMES and businesses will have a legal right to faster broadband by 2020. Sadly this was announced on social media so folk in the Highlands won’t hear about it until 2022.