It’sdifficulttofindreal friendshiplaterinlife
Bestselling author Jane Fallon on why she values her old friends and how she avoids hangers-on
With Fiora McFarlane Pale pink stiletto, riverisland.com FRIENDSHIPS can become a little tenuous when climbing the ladder to success, especially if you become rich and famous and suddenly find yourself surrounded by sycophants and hangers-on.
But top author Jane Fallon and her long-term partner Ricky Gervais still have the same friends from before they became celebrities.
Yes, they have some star pals – including Jonathan Ross, and Jane enjoys friendships with other female fiction writers, such as Adele Parks and Lisa Jewell – but the couple remain loyal to those who were there before that.
Jane said: “You make a choice about staying with the people you’ve always been connected with or not. I was 46 when my first book came out. Having those changes in your life when you’re older is probably a good thing – you know who you are and you’re more settled in life.”
Plus, she spends much of her time at home in London’s Hampstead, writing – often in her pyjamas.
Jane said: “I don’t even know where I’d stumble across someone, let alone convince them they’d want to be my best friend. You just don’t come across proper, deep, loyal friendships very easily later on in life.”
But it was Fallon’s personal experience with someone she thought was a great friend which gave her the idea for her latest novel, Faking Friends, a contemporary tale about an actress who returns from LA after losing her job, only to discover that her so-called best mate has been having an affair with her fiance in her absence.
She said: “We’d been close friends for years and she knew my ambition had been to write novels. We hadn’t seen each other for some time as we’d both been busy at work, and I happened to see her the day after I got the news that Penguin were picking up Getting Rid of Matthew in 2007.
“I said, ‘Oh my God, you won’t believe what’s happened to me’ – and she couldn’t even fake being happy for me for a second. She pulled a face and said, ‘Oh my God, it’s not going to be chick lit, is it?’
“In that moment I just thought, ‘You’re not really my friend’.”
So, what does she look for in friendships?
Jane said: “You want someone who has a similar sense of humour, similar sensibilities and I like the balance of someone that’s spiky and funny but also really kind. Ricky is clearly my best friend.”
They met at University College London, and her career was on the rise long before his – but they were never competitive.
She said: “When I was moving up, it was good that one of us was earning. I never felt I had to put pressure on him to have a big career, and he never felt overshadowed by the fact I was doing well.” Despite their success, Jane has never experienced forced friendships from hangers-on who want to be seen with them.
She said: “I’m lucky. I’ve got a good group of friends. I don’t feel the need to forge new bonds.”
In the past, her friends would reveal the nitty-gritty of their lives to her. Not any more, as it may end up in one of her novels, Jane quipped. Instead, they quiz their own friends, and go back to her with stories about other people’s relationships. Her own life with Gervais, however, has been pretty free of such trials and tribulations.
“Luckily, my life is uncomplicated, which lets me enjoy other people’s complicated messes.” Faking Friends by Jane Fallon is out tomorrow, priced £7.99
I like the balance of someone who is spiky and funny but also kind. Ricky is my best friend