Coleen says

HE’S younger and has recently come out, so he’s probably at that stage where he’s really enjoying being himself for the first time in his life, and I think you have to give him that time.

My worry is that if you keep telling him you should be together and make grand statements about spending the rest of your lives together, it might scare him off.

It doesn’t sound as if he’s ready to make that kind of commitment yet but that doesn’t mean he won’t be ready at some stage. You haven’t dated properly and I think you need to do that before making a judgment on whether you have a future together.

Sometimes people only realise how much they care about someone when they’ve spread their wings a bit. Take it slowly and see what develops.

I WAS struck by the letter from the woman whose daughters want nothing to do with her following her divorce from their father (Dear Coleen, March 1). I’m in a similar situation. My husband was violent towards me during our marriage and, while one of my children was supportive, the other two blamed me. I don’t know why they’re convinced I was at fault, but it still hurts today, even though I’ve moved on with my life.

I know that staying with my ex as long as I did had a massive impact on their lives. I could see he was a good dad to them but they couldn’t see how I was suffering. I know I’m not alone in this situation and lots of good mums have suffered in this way. Lynn, via email