Coleen says

FIRST of all, bother your girls – they can’t help if they don’t know you’re struggling. I’m sure if they know you’re lonely and feeling isolated, they’ll rally round.

When you have young children it’s easy to get absorbed by the day-to-day routines to keep all those balls in the air. But a regular coffee date in the diary and a phone call, or helping out with the grandkids could make all the difference. I know when I was a young mum, I was happy to take all the help that was offered.

You’re clearly still struggling to come to terms with your husband’s death, so why not try counselling? (visit crusescotland.org.uk).

It’s never too late to do this and it’s a good option if you want to talk about your husband, but don’t want to involve your daughters. It would be time just for you and you’d be talking to an expert whose job it is to listen.

Finally, put out some feelers for social groups and clubs in your area – visit the library and community centre, and look online for local clubs and Facebook groups. Once you get going, you’ll find lots of people of a similar age who are also looking for friendship.

I WONDER if the children who are against their parents giving up their home to be mortgage free and live in a static caravan worry that their lives will be less secure (Dear Coleen, April 27). The landowner can increase the ground rent as and when he chooses, and can raise it to what he likes. If the couple are aware of this and are able to fund any increase I’m sure, as you say, they will have a restful retirement. Lynn Manning, via email