Heatstroke heartbreak

SOMETIMES it’s worth telling a story just for the sheer sake of it.

There doesn’t need be a reason, a lesson or a moral – just a good story.

So… once upon a time, it was exceedingly hot and we were all worried about dogs overheating.

Around this time, there was great excitement as the day of the marriage of a lovely princess was looming. (I say princess but actually it was one of our veterinary nurses, which is the next best thing but doesn’t sound quite so good in a story).

Everyone was talking about the wedding (which I thought a bit odd, as there was no football involved in it) and what they were going to wear and how they were going to get shoes to match their lovely dresses.

Then the day dawned. Heart rates rose. But first, for some at least, there was work to be done. And so it came to pass that on the very day of the joining together of the princess and her handsome groom in holy matrimony, in burst a distraught lady with her collapsed dog.

He was in a bad way – collapsed, panting ferociously and burning hot to touch.

The story was a classic and easy to prevent with the benefit of hindsight.

A car parked in the shade. An errand to return an item to a shop. A queue that was longer and slower than expected. The decision to wait it out and then the awful realisation that, of course, the sun moves and what was once in the shade…

Heatstroke requires all hands on deck. A nurse soaks the neck and shoulders, another fetches oxygen. A vet administers cold water enemas and another nurse – the hero of our story – gets to work spraying the patient’s feet with spirit to increase evaporative heat loss.

All well and good and our dog survives to create a happy ending.

But, wait. There’s more. One contraindication for surgical spirit is fake tan.

It doesn’t actually tell you on the bottle but it should have a warning saying, “If you’re going to the wedding of the princess and have had special fake tan done on your legs, do not inadvertently spray it with surgical spirit, as your tan will run into funny brown and white streaks that make your legs look like a granny wearing old wrinkled tights”.

I told you it was a good story…