MY WIFE WANTS SEPARATE BEDS

Dear Coleen

MY wife and I have been together for 30 years and I thought we had a happy marriage. Our kids have grown up and left home, and we’re still close and do lots of things together.

However, recently she’s come up with the idea of us sleeping separately. She says she’s finding it hard to sleep in the same bed as me, so is constantly tired at work.

I feel quite hurt by the suggestion, though, and worry she might have lost interest.

We’re both in our mid-50s but we’re fit and young at heart and I don’t want this to be the end of our sex life.

Coleen says

YOU have to just ask her if there’s more to it than the fact she’s finding it hard to sleep. Be honest that you feel hurt by the suggestion and that it’s made you wonder if she feels differently about you.

I actually know a few couples who sleep in separate beds, but still have a good and active sex life. They just retreat to their own beds for sleep.

But I understand that it’s made you feel insecure and that’s what you have to explain to her.

Ask her how it’s going to affect your sex life and how she sees it working – does she want separate rooms or single beds in the same room?

If you’ve spent 30 years sleeping together in the same bed, then of course you want those questions answered.